Wednesday 8 June 2011

funeral day

This morning started chilly- 60 degrees F indoors and chillier out!
From 5am I had that knot in my solar plexus....after Redbush Tea and porridge, eaten slowly, I went to the garden to do the watering. I was stuck in the greenhouse with no raincoat, just a gilet, for a good 15 minutes!!
Then back, having decided on the card for Col. I wrote a proverb,

Uchaf ar gof a gerir orau.......What is best loved is remembered best.

and sewed a sprig of Rosemary to its side. "Rosemary....for remembrance" and had a matching sprig on my coat lapel.

I tried to fill the morning with ordinary things, but it wasn't easy. It was one of those feelings that would have been sorted by a Big Hug from Col, then I'd feel safe and everything was ok. So I remembered a hug instead.

Daughter and Family came, and after an early lunch we walked to the village church. More and more people came, and by the time Col was carried in, in his coffin, it was packed.
I was in my place behind him, and I couldn't have said what I'd written. His daughter read a poem, a friend who worked with the ponies with him read a tribute, and the vicar read the Family's tribute. The service was good, but much went over my head as I was there with Col.

Everyone stood and talked outside for a while, then Family and close friends went to the crematorium. We went in to a Welsh lullaby, "Suo Gan"...which really got to me, especially as Col loved children. The curtains closed and I felt SO empty.
The sunshine outside helped as did the vicar. She hadn't known who I was and was very understanding.

On the way back to the village the rain came down with a vengeance! Then it was dry again as we arrived- the weather certainly got it right today.

The Hotel was full, eventually, of Family and friends. I got to meet the other side of the family and got on well. In fact I have been "contacts" on Flickr for a year or more with one of Col's nieces by marriage!! That certainly surprised us both. So we had much to talk about, especially as she has twins like Daughter!

Much talking and meeting, looking at the photomontage of Col's life. A good end to the day, and a third step forward for everyone.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

I like the simplicity and the richness of your quote and sprig of rosemary. May you be well and comforted.

Sandy Miller said...

Blessings on the journey gz........

the older I get the smaller the world becomes, so glad you made a wonderful connection to Col's nieces! Amazing!

kjsutcliffe said...

((o)) xx

Zhoen said...

Tears for you. The kind that fall gently, unbidden, with healing.

Anonymous said...

hug

WOL said...

The "Rosemary for Remembrance" was a lovely touch. People go on about "those we've lost" -- but they're not lost. They've just gone on ahead. We'll catch up to them by and by, and we'll resume the journey together again.

Sara said...

((gz))

xx

Kath said...

sounds like a very peaceful and healing day
(Big hug)

Andrea Ingram said...

Lovely to read.
Much love
A

Anonymous said...

You wrote that beautifully, gz, thank you so much for sharing such a precious time with us. Hug Xx

Jo said...

I echo the sentiments about the sprig of rosemary. Such a simple but beautiful and natural way to keep faith with your memories.

Love and hugs xxx

The Cranky Crone, she lives alone! said...

You will find him in the wind on the mountain, ask for cuddles when you want them, you will get these and much more, and one day the the air will not be so thick and the world not so heavy....and laughing will not feel like betrayal it will be a shared honour a celebration of your life together.
I hope I have not spoken out of turn, I only wish to acknowlegde your bereavement.
Blessings to you and gentle hugs
xxx

Nera said...

(o) xxx

suzyQ said...

Rosemary-- such a sweet, gentle way to remember somebody you love. Thinking of you and sending a telepathic hug across the sea.

Gary's third pottery blog said...

So sorry to hear all this. Best wishes.

Peter said...

Kind thoughts from us here in New Zealand. I liked what "The Cranky Crone" wrote in her comment, in it is love and good sense. May you find healing for your grief, rest and peace. P xx

Michèle Hastings said...

"Cranky Crone's" words are so true. be well,
~m

herhimnbryn said...

He's on a new journey now...so are you. Peace be.