Tuesday 7 June 2011

no motivation

We had three hours or so of rain today, so I eventually cleaned the floors and did more house tidying.
I wish I could see this house as home, but it only felt like it when Col was here. The village certainly feels like home, so that is good anyway.

I just have no motivation to do stuff. I escaped to the garden twice yesterday. I was doing needed jobs there, but that isn't the point.

Funeral tomorrow. Hopefully that will give me another Moving On Point.


Go to find more stuff to sort and recycle.....

19 comments:

kjsutcliffe said...

It will pass, that 'nothing' feeling.It never fully goes but it becomes bearable. It is natural and understandable - I wish I could help.

Here is a *((hug))*

My word verification was colisere

gz said...

Col is 'ere indeed. In spirit if nothing else.

a hug and a smile helps.

Anonymous said...

In that case, here's another for you, from me ((gz))

So glad you have the village. Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Hold tight. xx

Sandy Miller said...

finally raining here today, badly needed.

many things are badly needed to keep us going and my top three are hugs, coffee and a thimble of good spirits!

best to you gz.........

Jo said...

Hugs from me too. Don't be surprised at feeling unsettled - it's all perfectly natural. It's summer (even in Wales!) so take full advantage of the outside jobs that need doing and enjoy them. Being out in the fresh air will do you far more good than a freshly hoovered carpet!

xxx

Kath said...

I'm sure the funeral will serve as a kind of punctuation point for you. I rmember well the feeling you describe, when my Dad died suddenly aged 61.
I would think about starting a new project in the garden and then think "Whats the point, he's not here to see it".
After a while the feeling passed and I realised he is always there, just out of sight x

gz said...

Yes, I think Zhoen is the only other I have seen asking you to leave a (o) stone/pebble. It makes sense.
Then you know what interesting people have called by, noyt just how many!

The Cranky Crone, she lives alone! said...

(O)
I only just found your site yesterday infact, loved your pottery and the thought we sounded pretty similar!
Well It was only today when I saw your mention funeral that I know we have more in common that just books, pottery and love of the wild, my husband passed on 5 years ago now, pretty suddenenly, as he was a strong outdoors type never been ill, or let anything get him down, just quitely got on with life and love.

My thoughts are with you.
Lynne

Compostwoman said...

Hope tomorrow goes as well as it can, gz and have a ((hug)) from me.

WOL said...

Wrong season of year, I know, but the last two lines are pertinent.
http://grundlepodmark2.blogspot.com/2011/02/samhain.html

gz said...

yes WOL, he is there, keeping me strong, laughing when I do things "his" way, just a warm presence

Michèle Hastings said...

the funeral will be another marker in your journey through grief. each one will bring a variety of feelings ranging from and fluctuating between deep sadness, sadness, anger and also happiness... happiness for the opportunity to have loved and been loved by someone very special...

yeractual said...

Tomorrow's a time for warm memories and moving on again, but always with an eye on the past, perhaps. Have strength, as usual. Best wishes.

Sara said...

More hugs from me gz, I hope you find some clarity after tomorrow.
Take care,
xx

Anonymous said...

thinking of you

Gary's third pottery blog said...

oh geez...wow, best wishes!

kjsutcliffe said...

Think of you

*((hug))*

x

Nera said...

(o) thinking of you today, sending a real welsh cwch xxx

Anonymous said...

Oh my, I have stopped by via 11am and realised I've found you at a very sad time.
Your recent posts are very moving - love and strength shine through.
I hope today went as you wanted it to, and that it helps your healing move forward.